Sweating the small stuff

Talking with a Christchurch Principal we chatted about the change of thinking in staff. Things that were trivial and unimportant have been placed in the trivial and unimportant box. This has been the default stance by so many people, including the many teachers in the christchurch area. People have been forced to take things the way they are and to not sweat the small stuff. I remember having a long conversation with my sons high school principal about how his school had travelled to India and worked with schools in the poorest parts of Delhi. When he returned to school he had a saying that was called "A I" which stood for "After India". The things he saw, the hardship, the poverty, the loss of life, the living conditions, brought so much reality and balance to his outlook. He believed this experienced was life changing stuff.

Recently the same Principal wrote in their newsletter about how wearing a neck tie was :

"about being aspirational in dress standards"

"boys gain confidence and are simply more teachable once they adopt aspirational and clear dress standards"

and this classic was that, wearing a tie :

"is seen in the minds of boys as being aspirational and being serious about their exam marks"

Clearly this Principal has completely forgotten his "after India" experience.

Often we have special needs students and they are very hard work. Over the years I've seen these kids come and go, they provide a massive challenge to schools. The parents can often be stressed, many times I have heard people judge these parents. I always pause and take a dose of reality, imagine being that parent, they have that special needs child forever. These people live with a massive dose of reality.

My questions are -

How long does this dose of realism remain ?

How can teachers, school leaders and parents not living in situations of true hardship get a dose of realism ?

Who is a true realist on your staff, and do you admire them ?

How do they act, and what can we learn from them ?

Is it fair to fob things off that is the small stuff, but is important to them ?

Seems its a juggling act sweating the small stuff as well as avoiding sweating the small stuff.